tumblr's prolly gonna delete half my shit so this is a backup b/c i can't even get the download to work (guess 2 gb is too much for my miserable connection to handle without shitting out like 5 network errors)
I love how humans have literally not changed throughout history like the graffiti from Pompeii has people from hundreds of years ago writing stuff like “Marcus is gay” “I fucked a girl here” “Julius your mum wishes she was with me” and leonardo da vinci’s assistants drew dicks in their notebooks just for the banter and mozart created a piece called “kiss my ass” so when people wish for ‘today’s generation’ to be like ‘how people used to’ then we’re already there buddy we’ve always been
The Hagia Sophia has inscriptions that were considered sacred for centuries until they were deciphered in the 70s to be Nordic runes saying “Halfdan wrote this”
my old english prof told us that theres a cave in Scandinavia where a viking gratified some runes like 14 feet up on the wall and when they finally reached it all it translated into was “this is very high”
Ancient Shitposting
Now on the History Channel
‘People have literally just always been people’ is genuinely my favorite fact about the world
“Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.” – Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106 BC – 43 BC
concept: me, a housewife, putting two lean cuisines in the microwave. i drink an entire bottle of chardonnay during the four minutes the chicken fettuccine takes to heat up. my husband walks through the door just as i place the entrée on the table. he thanks me for slaving away all day over a hot stove. i have succeed in passing the lean cuisine off as my own creation. when he’s done, i tell him im in love with our maid, helen–who bears a striking resemblance to margot robbie–and that i will see him in court. im blind drunk and jump into a 1960s pink convertible that helen is driving. we laugh about the lean cuisines.
“but women have sex organs on their chests! I don’t walk around with my pants off!”
I think what you mean to say is “women have secondary sex characteristics on their chests”, not sex organs
in which case let me remind you that your facial hair and enlarged adam’s apple are also secondary sex characteristics
if secondary sex characteristics bother you and you feel they should be covered up in public, please feel free to shove your entire head in a bag at any time
except boobs are sexual and adams apples arent no one fucks an adams apple
No one fucks boobs either, boobs’ purpose are to feed babies…
Sorry to inform you, but people definitely fuck boobs.
That is literally impossible.
If fucking something = just rubbing your dick on it until you cum then by that logic you COULD fuck an adam’s apple (might be uncomfortable for the other guy tho).
Breasts are for feeding infants. That’s it.
The fact that porn, lingerie ads, movies and t.v. shows have been saying otherwise since they were invented (and porn, in one form or another has been around for centuries) isn’t relevant.
If you think boobs are for fucking, you’ve been brainwashed.
countess k8's tumblr backup 