tumblr's prolly gonna delete half my shit so this is a backup b/c i can't even get the download to work (guess 2 gb is too much for my miserable connection to handle without shitting out like 5 network errors)
Honestly I’m not gonna survive the apocalypse. Y’all go on gathering berries and drinking cockroach milk (apparently) and forming barter economies and I’m gonna stay in my house until the last of my seltzer runs out and then I’m gonna put on an all cashmere outfit and lay down and die. Have fun fending off the coyotes and doomsday cults and living on expired canned goods in a world with no more Netflix. Pass.
ten years ago I was walking through my high school in a wet swimsuit to get my dive coach when I witnessed a girl getting in trouble because she had a custom LED belt buckle that scrolled the message “BOY GIMME THAT JOHNSON” and I loved it so much that I couldn’t even go back to practice, I just went home and went to sleep